Archive for 2012

I believe in Fairies.

Posted 15 May 2012 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category Abigail, motherhood, paparazzi, The Hubs, toddler business

This past weekend, we had our second visit from a fairy for Abbers. This time, it was the Binkie Fairy. (The Bottle Fairy made an appearance a little while ago.)

This is something we’ve been discussing for a while. It was more difficult of a decision to make than the bottles. This (aside from diapers which I will not miss at all) felt like her last tie to babyhood. She still used it for naps, bedtime, car rides and general soothing. And MY GOD did it ever work. With her binkie and blankie both in use, her eyes would almost just shut in a Pavlovian response, unable to stay open. It made her so happy.

However, she’s getting to the age where I just didn’t want to see her tied to the binkie anymore. God forbid we leave the house without one (and it happened on occasion) and it’s meltdown city. Not to mention, she more times than not just held it in her mouth like a cigar, and one of her front teeth is showing the real damage – it’s crooked and seems like it just isn’t coming in all the way.

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The stogie hold. She's got it down to a science.

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The crooked tooth. "Shrek teeth" as Uncle Ernie calls them.

So the decision was made. Again, we would plan it for a Friday night. (You know, so we could potentially not sleep all weekend while she cried a sadly, lonely cry for her “binkie-bink.”) We could collect all the binkies from the house, and put them in a bag. This time leaving them at the back door. Then, in the middle of the night, the Binkie Fairy would come and collect all the binkies to give to new babies who needed them (totally gross and not hygienic at all) and in turn, she would leave a present for Abby. Or he. Who am I to judge.

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The binks, the balloons from the Binkie Fairy and leaving it by the back door.

The hubs and I decided this gift needed to be huge. This is a big deal and probably difficult to give up cold turkey, so it needed to be something she couldn’t just throw at us yelling “GIVE ME MY BINKIE-BINK! I DON’T LIKE ANYTHING!” With spring in full bloom and only an empty, unused dog kennel as a totally unsafe plaything in the backyard, we opted for a playhouse. And then grabbed a slide as a second gift.

When settling in for the night, she did pretty well. She was exhausted, so it went much easier than expected, although right before falling asleep, she was pretty much crying, saying “I don’t want any presents! I want binkie-bink!” Like I said though, fell asleep anyway.

The next morning, the first words out of her mouth were “I don’t want presents.” Typical. So, the hubs and I took turns getting up and arranging things in a pretty manner, and then I came into our bedroom, where Abby and the hubs were laying.

“Abby – I just looked. The binkie fairy came. You’re going to be so excited!”

She finally got up, and saw a couple smaller things we got her, a bubble gun and a new box of Aden + Anais swaddle blankets – her blankie of choice. Then we showed her outside. She went down the steps in her little pajamas yelling “A PLAYHOUSE! SHE BROUGHT ME A PLAYHOUSE!” SO stoked.

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The happy lady. If you look hard enough you can see our neighbors dried up Christmas tree.

We spent the morning putting everything together. And spent the whole weekend binkie free. She struggles at nighttime, naptime, or when she’s exhausted and wants to soothe herself. She gets by though.

I consider us lucky. She’s getting a cold, and this is usually when she wants it the most, but she’s been okay. I know not everyone will have the same, low-key results we did. (We still hear “I don’t WANT my clubhouse, momma. I don’t want ANYTHING!” on occasion. So we’re not whine-free.)

Best decision we’ve made in a while.

Has anyone else tried this tactic? I would love to hear more results! Or let me know if you decide to try this!

 

Just keep swimming.

Posted 11 May 2012 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category uncategorized

I am a 31 year old woman who has to plug her nose underwater.

This is one of the thoughts I had daily while we were on vacation in the Turks & Caicos. It was embarrassing.

Without plugging my nose, I panic. Without doing it my way, I feel like I’m going to drown.

My life is like a wave pool, constantly throwing me underwater, having the power to make panic.

But I’ve decided to remind myself that I can…no, I NEED to make sure that I’m doing things the way I need to do them. I need to take care of myself and make sure that I’m not drowning.

Plugging my nose shouldn’t be embarrassing. It’s the way I get by. It’s the only way I know how.

This blog is one of the ways I’ve gotten through everything life has thrown at me. My panic, the medication to dissolve the anxiety, my lack of taking care of me have unfortunately been reasons I’ve been away. I love blogging. I don’t ever want that part of me to go away.

I have a lot of things going on in my life I’m excited to write about. It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to say that. And now I am.

Just another Thursday night.

Posted 13 Apr 2012 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category Abigail, motherhood

Tonight, Abby and I spent the evening together while the hubs attended a basketball game with friends. I put her to bed, scooped some litter and headed to my own bed, when I thought I heard Abby cry. I ran to the monitor and checked and there was nothing. Which could mean only one of three things:

1) I’m losing my mind.
2) Abby’s mastered ventriloquism in her sleep.
3) There are burglar babies breaking into my house as we speak.

So guess what? FAIL.

Posted 15 Mar 2012 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category I am a moron, not so much

Two things.

One) I started drinking soda again. Yesterday I had three. DAMMIT. I had finally gotten past the headaches and then it was like FUCK IT and then I started drinking them again. Like my friend Martini said – “Soda is addictive, like ciggies. And thank god you’re not addicted to those because that’s way worse.” I couldn’t agree more. So I’m just going to try to cut back. To only one per day max. And then try to have days where I don’t have any. (Yeah RIGHT.) Even the guy at Bruegger’s this morning said “You need the good stuff, right?” after hearing my reply to “Diet or Regular?” (REGULAR DUH.)

Whatever.

B.) My back pain? Not related to the caffeine withdrawal. That sonofabitch Chiropractor really did eff me up. (No offense people of chiropractic persuasion.)

I’m not kidding you, internets. I couldn’t get in and out of bed or the car without yelping in pain and attempting some Cirque du Soliel bullshit maneuvers to do it painlessly. There WAS no painless way. I couldn’t do anything. Sitting made it worse. Standing made it worse. Laying down hurt, but then after a full night’s sleep I’d wake up and be like “WHOA! Back to normal!” and then after standing in the shower for 5 minutes be wishing for hit to be placed on the fine gentleman who “adjusted” my back. Poo on you, dude. Friday I finally went to a doctor (read, someone who would give me pain meds) and he declared that I had a “Severe Muscle Sprain/Strain” in my lower back. No nerve damage. Just some effed up muscles (which I figured.) He prescribed the most useless pain meds ever and some muscle relaxers that knock me on my ass.

Example:
I took one after my appointment when I was home resting on the couch, and I went from being in pain and watching some Emmy quality COPS episodes, to knocked the eff out Mike Tyson style. I woke up an hour or so later so mentally handicapped that I spent the next 45 minutes trying to discern whether I was awake, or if I was dreaming that I was feeding Abby a late lunch. Turned out I was awake. And slurring.

I tried taking only half of one last night to be comfortable laying down and hoping to not go back to Mars but I still woke up in the middle of the night with no idea where I was, but believing that I just had a conversation with Cosmo Kramer and that he was probably in the living room waiting to continue our discussion. It took me about 5 minutes before I realized I had been sleeping and that I am not in a Seinfeld episode. OR AM I?

Regardless, my back is sllloowwwllyy getting better. It’s still extremely stiff and now my hips hurt, but I assume it’s from all the overcompensation the rest of my body was doing trying to not have anymore of the worst pain ever. It needs to heal, and fast. A big group of friends is headed to see Jane’s Addiction at a smaller venue on Monday, and then Thursday night I have to fly in a plane for like, 3.5 hours…which means sitting and panicking and also sitting which equals pain. BUT IT WILL BE BETTER BY THEN. Right? Yes, yes it will, Jenna.

Maybe I should have gone to detox.

Posted 07 Mar 2012 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category I am a moron, not so much

I haven’t had a soda since Sunday.

I’ve had a debilitating headache since 2pm on Monday.

I thought maybe it was sinuses since my eyes hurt, and well as my forehead, but I’m not having any other symptoms (ie snot over-production).

In the meantime, my back has been whack (see what I did there?) so I went to the chiropractor yesterday thinking it would help my headache and my back. My upper back’s been giving me grief for a week, and then yesterday the lower back was getting achy.

So, I got an adjustment. My upperback? Awesome. My lower back? Completely unusable.  I can’t do anything. I can’t bend over, I can’t walk normal, I can’t even pick up Abbers. It hurts all the time. Fer Christ’s sake – I’m sitting at my desk at work with my heating pad on. I BROUGHT MY HEATING PAD TO WORK. Ugh. I’m old.

Enter DR. GOOGLE!

Turns out I’m suffering from caffeine withdrawal. Symptoms can include headache (which can last from 1-5 days, and centers behind the eyes, and then to the front of the head), lethargy, insomnia, fatigue, and flu like symptoms, such as nausea, vomiting, muscle pain and stiffness.

Part of me is like, well, I should just have a soda and it’ll make everything better! But then I think about crack addicts and they’re all like “I’ll just smoke more crack and then I won’t feel bad anymore!” Granted, I know a 32 oz cup of Coca-cola is no crack, but I just don’t know what to do. It’s just soda. Lord knows I’m not giving it up for good, just trying to cut back. But this? RIDICULOUS. I might just have one during lunch to see if my headache subsides. Ibuprofen won’t touch it. Like, 600mgs of ibuprofen.

Isn’t there some place called the Palms where I can detox with celebs? Someone send me there.