Hey y’all! I’m back and have many stories to tell. In the meantime, enjoy the recap of Twitter posts I had while I was gone. (A better post with thoughts lasting longer than 140 words is forthcoming. Old Bessie (aka our laptop) is totally on it’s last legs, so my work compy and my phone are my only posting options. SO not cool.)

Off to the airport in futuristic light rail fashion. On my way to Satan’s Pants AKA Phoenix. #satanspants 3:25 PM Jun 10th via twidroid

Security made me take my sweater off. First thought? Thank god I removed the tag so no one knows it’s a maternity sweater. #notpregnant 3:55 PM Jun 10th via twidroid

A beautiful day for flight. http://twitpic.com/1vmrbf 4:25 PM Jun 10th via twidroid

Airport dinner: Whopper Jr and Triscuits, enjoyed with the soothings sounds of crying children and loud douchbags on cellphones. Thursday, June 10, 2010 4:30:38 PM via twidroid

Well. This doesn’t look good. They seem to be working on the engine. Que dramatic thoughts of plane crashing. Thursday, June 10, 2010 4:35:15 PM via twidroid

Pretty sure I just saw the pilot walking around said engine while scratching his head. Yet, my flight begins boarding in 5 minutes. #awesome Thursday, June 10, 2010 4:44:51 PM via twidroid

Ah, the walk thru first class. “Here’s where you’re NOT sitting! Enjoy your lower class amenities!” Alright tweeps. See you in hell/Phoenix. Thursday, June 10, 2010 5:09:57 PM via twidroid

Signs of a good flight, including but not limited to, wine. http://twitpic.com/1voq0o Thursday, June 10, 2010 8:54:20 PM via twidroid

Hello Phoenix. Hello 106 degrees. Hello Satan’s Pants. http://twitpic.com/1voqik Thursday, June 10, 2010 8:55:41 PM via twidroid

Yep. It’s hot here. 81 degrees at 7am? WRONG. Friday, June 11, 2010 9:02:04 AM via twidroid

It’s hot out…and I’m about to lay out by a pool. Do I need a head check? Friday, June 11, 2010 11:36:20 AM via twidroid

Beer at 11:30 on a Friday. I like where this is going. Friday, June 11, 2010 1:38:57 PM via twidroid

Hey…here’s my #FF – see the list of people I follow? FOLLOW THEM. ALL OF THEM. #notjustthebeertalking Friday, June 11, 2010 1:45:07 PM via twidroid

Playing with sponge rollers. http://twitpic.com/1vx1gc Friday, June 11, 2010 3:56:39 PM via twidroid

At a place called Hula, about to eat some Ahi…enjoying EXCELLENT company. Friday, June 11, 2010 8:27:50 PM via twidroid

Prescott, here we come! http://twitpic.com/1w9nip Saturday, June 12, 2010 5:19:50 PM via twidroid

Two hot beetches driving in the desert. http://twitpic.com/1w9ytl Saturday, June 12, 2010 6:00:43 PM via twidroid

My bladder has hit critical mass. Ten miles to go. It’s gonna be a close one. Saturday, June 12, 2010 6:10:33 PM via twidroid

We’ve arrived. http://twitpic.com/1waq4q Saturday, June 12, 2010 7:34:21 PM via twidroid

CAKE! Now? BOOZE! http://twitpic.com/1wc336 Saturday, June 12, 2010 10:04:23 PM via twidroid

First bar has a live country band. I’m screwed. And not in a good way. Saturday, June 12, 2010 10:57:37 PM via twidroid

Real life cowboys. So so so awesome. Saturday, June 12, 2010 11:02:27 PM via twidroid

Makes everything better (meaning the country music). http://twitpic.com/1wctnd Saturday, June 12, 2010 11:18:58 PM via twidroid

That was a really big tequila shot. And I’m so so glad I’m married. This place is a meat market and my ring is like kryptonite. Sunday, June 13, 2010 12:12:06 AM via twidroid

Tequila shot + dancing my ass off to Stevie Ray Vaughan= making much of my family proud Sunday, June 13, 2010 12:48:55 AM via twidroid

Metal music. I’m home. Sunday, June 13, 2010 3:09:44 AM via twidroid

Good lord. Need ibuprofen. And gatorade. And also ibuprofen. Sunday, June 13, 2010 10:41:32 AM via twidroid

Old timey photos and my second bloody mary. I heart vacay. Sunday, June 13, 2010 3:01:04 PM via twidroid

Just saw Sex & the City 2. “Lawrence of my labia?” No. NO. Sunday, June 13, 2010 11:31:45 PM via twidroid

Last hours in Phenix will be spent shopping at Last Chance. And then airport & goodbye. Monday, June 14, 2010 11:55:39 AM via twidroid

Last hours will also be spent misspelling “Phoenix.” Monday, June 14, 2010 11:57:49 AM via twidroid

See these Michael Kors shoes? $30. THEY’RE MINE NOW. http://twitpic.com/1wshne Monday, June 14, 2010 12:28:11 PM via twidroid

See you later Phoenix! Time for 64 degrees & rain. Monday, June 14, 2010 2:30:06 PM via twidroid