I hate when I wish for entire weeks to be over, when it’s only Tuesday.

As I hinted in my last post – we got the bug over the weekend. Well, to be specific, I got it Saturday (along with the mom-& sister-in-laws). I thought it was a weird hangover caused by a mere 3 beers the night before. When I threw up at 3 in the afternoon, it just felt wrong. But I felt better. And then I felt worse. MUCH MUCH WORSE. The hubs kept Abbers away from me all night and slept in the living room so I could rest. I slept like crap, but felt better Sunday.

Monday morning, the hubs wakes up to find SURPRISE! He has it now. I have Mondays off, so I kept her in the living room and away from the sick room and she was happy as a clam. Teething like a mofo, but hyper and cute and cuddly as could be. We had an awesome day together. I chose to sleep on the couch as the hubs had, and put Abby down, only to have her wake up like, 6 times during the night. At 1:30, I brought her onto the couch with me where she slept on my chest for an hour before I brought her back to bed. It was so cozy, and I just figured she was in the clear, she’d survived without getting ill.

This morning, shortly after only finishing half of her bottle, she threw up. And I immediately felt like a failure.

I know it’s not my fault, and I know there’s not much I could have done to keep her from getting this, but I felt it anyway. The mother-in-law came over today to watch her, and sadly she was the one to get puked on. I then felt horrible that I couldn’t be home with my daughter when she was going to be at her sickest. Abby didn’t seem to mind to much, she was settled in nicely on her grandma’s lap with a book.

Then I tried to leave for work.

She whined and reached out for me.

I picked her up and tried my hardest not to cry. Especially in front of her, with her already being sick and upset. I teared up but kept myself together, gave her a gentle squeeze and she grabbed on harder, sensing I was going to try to hand her back to grandma. I let go, said “See you in a few hours, sweetpea!” walked out of the house and lost my shit. I cried the whole 2 blocks to the train.

I’m tired. I’ve eaten 3 pieces of toast, a bowl of soup, a bowl of cereal and a box of macaroni & cheese since Friday night. I don’t want my daughter to be sick. I want my husband to be back to 100%.

I want this week to be over.