Target Thursday.

Posted 13 Mar 2008 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category uncategorized

I just spent $25 at Target on misc office organization items. The attic WILL be finished this weekend. Then, I will take pictures of the whole house for everyone’s viewing pleasure. Tada!

Number of times I slipped on the ice during my walk to the train this morning: 6
Number of times I almost fell down: 2
Number of times I was made fun of by some wanna be gansta kid walking to school: 1

It’s supposed to be 50°F today. Yippie! And another site thinks it’ll be in the 60s in 2 weeks. Bring it ON.

That’s all I got right now.

Weekend wrap.

Posted 10 Mar 2008 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category house stuffs

A weekend where I got something accomplished?! WHAT?!

Yes, it’s true. I got some things done this weekend. I single-handedly programmed and installed a wireless garage door opener keypad on our garage (hooray me!). Gone are the days of bringing our one and only remote in the house with us every time we get home. (We have a detached garage that lacks a side door.) I also cleaned the shit out of the attic. Literally and figuratively. I only have 1/4 of a box left to unpack (unpacked a total of 5) and have to organize/clean the office area of said attic. I will take a picture of the closet portion. I can now see all of my shoes out and about now. It’s a glorious feeling. I also filled up an entire garbage bag full of clothes to donate to Goodwill. Awesome. I hung a hook rack to hang my purses on. It’s mine, all mine! (and to drive that fact home, I also unpacked a portion of my doll (creepy or otherwise) collection. That should deter the hubs from wanting to hang out up there. He has his drums, I have my dolls.)

Anyway, the hubs brewed some beer. *snicker* Actually, I should give him more credit, it was a lengthy, nit-picky process that took up a good portion of the day. (Lacey, I think he uses Brewers’ Best? Or something. Anyway, the kit was annoying. They don’t use consistent names for everything so it gets confusing.) We’ll know in about a week how this batch turned out. :) He did that mostly himself while I installed openers and organized the attic.

So, hooray for a sense of accomplishment. I had a craving for seared yellowfin tuna that was never satisfied over the weekend. Hmmmm…

Today, I finally bought my ticket to visit Martini. CANNOT WAIT. Funny how, once again, my spring/summer weekends are dropping away one by one, and it’s only March. :)

Ahh, Friday.

Posted 07 Mar 2008 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category house stuffs

Friday has never seemed so good. Although this was only a 4 day week for me, it’s been a long one. Not to mention cold. My legs were frozen solid by the time I made it to the train station 2.5 blocks from my house. (It’s a whopping -3° F right now, and it’s 9:30am!) It’s supposed to be around 40° F next week, and I cannot wait! I just want the snow to melt so we can hang out in our backyard. :)

No big plans for the weekend, although I have a few things I’d like to do. The finished attic of our house is being used as an office/closet for me. And it’s a complete MESS. I want to buy a bunch of hooks to hang my plethora of purses on, unpack my 3 boxes of shoes, and just tidy things up a bit. That’s an all weekend project. The hubs is planning on brewing beer this weekend, so maybe while he’s doing that I’ll play with my shoes and clothes. The whole house needs a bit of a tidying as well. Ah, to be Susy-homemaker again. 😛

What the hell day is it?

Posted 05 Mar 2008 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category cancer sucks

I had off on Monday (to drive back from ‘sconnie) and it’s thrown me for a loop this week. I tried going to a meeting that was yesterday because my brain was fully convinced today is Tuesday. Annoying. Plus, my sinuses are on full attack. A coworker who pretty much has a pharmacy in his desk drawer gave me a cocktail of Sudafed and generic Excedrin. Needless to say, I still have a headache.

So, the weekend went by too quickly. It was awesome seeing my family. Seeing my Aunt Julie was rough. She looked a little better than I imagined she would, but it was hard watching her push the button on her IV drip of pain meds. She kept reaching back to her left side occasionally when the pain was getting unbearable. We were there for about 15-20 minutes before we left – she seemed glad – I’m sure she immediately went back to bed to lay down. I felt horrible we didn’t stay for longer, but knew she was struggling the whole time. I decided that we would be coming home for Easter so I can see her again. Her boys should be home then too, so I can see everyone. The next few months are going to be rough.

I have a weird, horrible feeling that this is going to be a bad year for my family. I know my aunt won’t last through this Christmas. Something tells me my grandma might go before 2008 is done too.

Enough sad talk.

However, right now I don’t have much more to add. I’ll try to cheer things up later.

Stressed doesn’t begin to describe…

Posted 28 Feb 2008 — by Mrs. Jenna
Category cancer sucks

It’s my Aunt Julie. She’s sick again. Not even again – she’s just going downhill. She hasn’t really gotten better – that would constitute an “again.”

She was in the hospital in November, but pulled through. She’s in so much pain right now, nothing’s helping. I think she’s really giving up this time, the pain’s just too much. The (rare) optimist in me says “don’t worry! She’ll pull through like she always does.” But the realist in me knows she can’t keep doing this. She’s stage four, as far as I know. I just can’t fathom what the hell is going on. I’m removed slightly from the situation since I live 5 hours away…I only hear things when they get really bad. Lately I’ve been hearing a lot. My Aunt Mitzi is trying to guarantee her own remission and trying to find a cure for her Julie at the same time. My mom is trying to help both of them and my grandma (who also is dealing with (ovarian) cancer), while also trying to keep her shit together.

What do I even do? I feel so damn helpless. I don’t know if I can see her. She’s so sick. My grandpa died in November, right before I started this blog. I didn’t get a chance to see him before he died. My Aunt Mitzi and my mom kept saying that it was probably good that I didn’t see him, so I could remember him in a good way; when he could remember who i was and would get a smile on his face when he saw me. He was thin and frankly out of his mind from the alzheimers when he died. I am happy I didn’t make it up to see him. I guess I don’t think I could feel that way about Julie. She’s still there, beneath the pain and cancer. She’d still smile when she saw me, if the pain allowed.

This wine isn’t helping me feel better. Maybe another glass. :)

Then I start thinking about her two boys and I just lose it. Their dad’s been gone (died of a heart attack) for over 20 years. What will they do? I feel guilty I’m not closer to them.

I need to stop.

I’m going home this weekend (a trip planned long before I knew the situation with Julie), so hopefully I can stop by and see her. I’ll try to take my parents minds off of things and try to make my grandma laugh and act like things are mostly normal.

If anything, today has made my will to walk those 60 miles in September even more. The fact Julie can survive day-to-day with her pain means I can walk 20 miles a day for 3 days. That’s the least I can do. And hope that enough money is raised enough so that some day people won’t have to put up with this shit.